Couples’ Friendships

Couples’ Friendships

A few weeks ago, we were on a double date with another couple. Over a great dinner and drinks, the wife of the couple we were with said, “We need to hang out with more married couples.” She went on to mention that it was the first time she had sat down in a restaurant since COVID pandemic. (COVID has really changed things!) We all agreed in the moment that the time spent was great and we committed to hanging out again soon.

Her words stuck with us and opened us up to share about the importance of having other couples to hang out with and fellowship. The benefits of having other couples in your circle cannot be underestimated. Transitioning from a single life to DATING to the MARRIED life is a unique experience but it is just that, an EXPERIENCE.

Such a transition is full of highs and lows, successes and challenges. Doubts about being exclusive will surely creep in. This is where having other couples in your circle comes into play as it gives you and your spouse / significant others another perspective (couples who are on the same journey as you) to whom you can relate. But beware, you must be careful about whom you allow into your circle. It’s important to identify couples who are equally determined to work and stay together, who desire to have and/or live in a God centered marriages, and who are committed to evolving together.

As we continue along in our own marriage journey, here are a few things we’ve discovered as best practices and benefits in maintaining couple/marriage friendships:

Find Couples Who are Seasoned Vets – We’ve learned that spending time with couples who have years of marriage under their belts gives us a window into their wisdom and tactics of how they make it work. Not only can you learn from what they say, you can also learn by observing how they interact with one another. These are the couples with whom you want to ask lots of questions and do more listening than talking.

Find Couples With Whom You Share Similarities – This is so important. We cannot count all the wonderful couples we’ve been blessed to share experiences with. Whether it be over dinner, at night at the club, travelling, church functions, or any other event; all of it has played a part in shaping and enhancing our own marriage. Couples who share your values provide you with someone from whom you can receive but also provide sound advice. You have the opportunity to share experiences about raising children (or the desire to have children); the opportunity to share in the common frustrations and challenges that are unique to dating/marriage; the opportunity to share experiences and efforts of what you are doing to ensure success in marriage.

Find Couples Who Strive to Live in a God Centered Marriage – There are several books of the Bible that speak about the sanctity and purpose of marriage (Gen. 2:24; Eph. 5:28,33; Hebrews 13:4). It’s important to surround yourselves with Couples who understand the power of prayer and presence of God in their marriage. This will give you the opportunity to cover one another and encourage one another in the promises God gave for marriage. With such like minded Couples, you can give and receive wise counsel grounded in biblical principle and navigate the marriage journey in a way God intended.

We encourage you to be prayerful, purposeful and intentional as you identify other Couples with whom you interact and/or strengthen relationships. Don’t let the age of Couples or the number of years they have been together be an overwhelming factor. We enjoy fellowship and have learned from Couples of all ages, backgrounds and years of marriage. The most important thing, it gives us the opportunity not only to mentor but to be mentored.

We’d love your perspective on this week’s Blog. Be sure to like, share, and leave a comment.